I thought postpartum phase was the few days after giving birth but the truth is it went beyond that for me. I spent so much time putting together a birth plan that I never used with no game plan for the postpartum period. Some things, such as the sleepless nights, I had prepared for them while some were eye opening. Now that some time has passed; I feel comfortable sharing with you some of my personal eye-openers or things I wish I had better prepared myself for.

Your recovery maybe a steep slope – I praised this body as I watched it grow every month. Towards the end, this body was tired and achy but had done a phenomenal job. So I thought once my gift enters the world I will feel so much lighter, which it did, but it also came at a price. I was sore, I had a scar and a dark belly. I was very uncomfortable and in so much pain. I wondered why I couldn’t give this body the same praise I used to give it when it was expanding. Why was I trying to make it do chores that I wasn’t ready for? Or why was I rushing it to “snap back” when this process is a marathon not a sprint? I honestly didn’t prepare for all these feelings and thoughts but now I know better. If you have help, lean on your support, give yourself time, be gentle and patient with the temple of the Lord. When I look back; I’m in awe of what my body is capable of.

Breastfeeding is a roller coaster – Anaishe and I were off to a good start with our breastfeeding journey as she latched right away. I had a schedule to pump whenever she was not on the boob and everything was going well. At some point, my milk supply dropped drastically! Baby girl refused to latch even when I was producing milk which meant pumping on the clock and that had to be one of the most exhausting tasks. I tried everything under the sun to get back my milk supply! The worst part of it all was everything that was working now wasn’t all of a sudden. I was miserable and I had to put a stop to breastfeeding and introduce formula. I underestimated the toll breastfeeding had on my mental health but now I know that if something is not working there is no shame in pivoting.

Newborn phase comes and goes in a flash – This is by far my favourite phase when it comes to babies. They don’t go anywhere – so tiny and precious. We can snuggle for a long time too. Now looking back, I wish I snuggled more and enjoyed those moments. I spent so much time worrying about a routine and putting her down for fear of her being so attached to me. Before I knew it, baby girl was rolling and a bit more independent! Now she’s not a big fan of cuddling at all which makes me a little bit sad because I miss snuggling her.

Postpartum hair loss is real – I can deal with chunks of hair falling off while I take a shower. What I did not prepare for is my hairline also taking a hit. The thought of my hairline moving back does not sit well with me at all. I have been proactive by making sure that I put oils and moisturizer but I can’t help but notice the little patches. Believe it or not, this brought an insecurity I didn’t know I had on top of the other ones. I have to constantly remind myself that “it’s just hair” and it will eventually grow back. A good friend of mine once told me that I have to continue taking my prenatal vitamins and that has been helping too.

Mom guilt is overwhelming – My goal was to breastfeed for 6 months and then introduce formula. It so happened that my supply issues started around the 6 month mark. I felt so bad for weaning her even though I knew it had to be done for everyone’s sanity. I had also met my goal so there shouldn’t be a problem right?! Here I was feeling so terrible because my body is not doing what it’s supposed to do. I’m also thinking “society” says push through until baby turns one and I couldn’t do it. I remember feeling helpless and worrying so much every time she got a cold and blaming myself for taking her out. The truth is babies get sick too and that’s part of the process which in turn helps develop their immune system. Let’s not forget that a fed baby is a happy baby. I’m still learning to extend grace and giving myself room to learn.

I hope you enjoy reading this post just as much as I enjoyed writing 🙂 Until next post; bye for now!